Everyone knows me for being pretty open and honest here on my blog so I wanted to share a few of my thoughts with you. I am feeling a little down. My mother suffered greatly with depression and I remember my dad telling me that my mom would always be down after a vacation.
I don't feel depressed and I know I don't take after my mother because she also dealt with alcoholism. What I do know is that my trip to Chicago was so emotional for me that I just seem to be breaking into tears when I try to think about writing my post about it. Tears are falling down my face and I type this.
Sometimes we experience things that just so beyond wonderful that it takes your breath away. I am thinking that it is only natural for me to be a little down right now because I was riding high in Chicago. Imagine a trip that involved seeing your brother, seeing your dearest friend after twelve years, having my whole family there with me to show off, having a family reunion of sorts at a family wedding, visiting a family spot full of great memories and of course eating the best pizza's Chicago has to offer!
Then you come home to reality and your husband is leaving on a two week trip to Europe just 8 hours after you arrive home at midnight. Besides the fact that you road an emotional roller coaster getting the phone call between flights that your dog was sick. Here I am almost a week later and I'm just coming down to reality. Oh yes and I still have all the laundry from our trip waiting for me to do since I went ahead and let the kids do theirs first.
Suddenly it hit me that it is going to be October and I am turning 61! Wondering what I have accomplished since I hit 60 last year and wanted to change my world as I knew it. Then on top of that I started to think OMG the holiday's are just around the corner....how can that be!
Now to top this off I just found out something today (Friday) that made me pretty mad. I took Skye in today for her check up after her ruptured anal gland. All is well, healing great and they took out the drainage thingy. Doesn't have to go back and so very thankful that all turned out so well. But there is more to this story.
When the kids arrived in Chicago Amber told me that I should take Skye to the vet when we get home because she has a sore near her butt. Come to find out today that Skye could barely walk that day when they took her in but no one told me. They even called Mark to ask what they should do. They were afraid that the kennel wouldn't take her if she was sick. Do you realize that maybe, just maybe something really bad could have happened in the mean time before we picked her up. Thank God the kennel noticed it but it wasn't until Sunday. I feel like they put Skye's life at risk and it makes me so sad. They could have at least been more honest when they arrived on Thursday morning and I could have alerted the kennel.
Now to top this off I just found out something today (Friday) that made me pretty mad. I took Skye in today for her check up after her ruptured anal gland. All is well, healing great and they took out the drainage thingy. Doesn't have to go back and so very thankful that all turned out so well. But there is more to this story.
When the kids arrived in Chicago Amber told me that I should take Skye to the vet when we get home because she has a sore near her butt. Come to find out today that Skye could barely walk that day when they took her in but no one told me. They even called Mark to ask what they should do. They were afraid that the kennel wouldn't take her if she was sick. Do you realize that maybe, just maybe something really bad could have happened in the mean time before we picked her up. Thank God the kennel noticed it but it wasn't until Sunday. I feel like they put Skye's life at risk and it makes me so sad. They could have at least been more honest when they arrived on Thursday morning and I could have alerted the kennel.
Coming home from the kennel on Monday.
Charlie and Skye.
So here is what I did today. I know that the most emotional part of the trip was seeing our dear friend Diane. I also knew that I wanted to write a post on my For Your Tears blog because so much of that blog has to due with our friends losing their son 12 years ago. I also knew that if I included that story when I posted about our trip that it would make my posts very long. So I have written my post on my blog FOR YOUR TEARS and it would be wonderful if you could find some time to read it. It is long but it gives you all the background of our dear friends and why the trip was over the top emotionally for me.
Love you guys!
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26 comments:
I am sorry terriblely sorry you had no idea about Skye! It hurts me because I know how much you love her.My mother dealt with depression too, but my dad was a running man if that makes sense I don't want to just pin point it out because he has passed on.I am dealing with depression too, but trying so hard to fight it.I planned to have the huge project done at my house way before now and I am not even half way there.I have senior photo's to take for Elizabeth and her fiance Matt today and I'm on pins and needles.I don't know wht all you come up with since you turned 60 till now but I can tell you I feel closer to you, like I know you and I have never meet you.Funny thing I had a dream last night I meet you at a baseball game...Lol.The past year you have been a real friend to me and that made a huge differance in my life...you have taught me alot.So in the almost past year you have been a real friend,prayed for my family and me, a teacher for teaching me lessons, and more.You are a true friend and if I don't ever meet you at a real baseball game...Lol..I'll see you in heaven (((hugs)))
So sorry you are feeling down, Debby but try to focus on the good things like seeing your family and friends again in Chicago and yes, eating that good pizza. One thing thing good about being down is that it could only go up so do not let it park there, go back up. So sorry about Skype. Somethimes we think our children should think like us but they don't and we just have to accept it. Hopefully when they get older, they will.You know you have all of uc to listen when you are lonely. Take care!...Christine
Ooops, did I say Skype? I meant Skye of course. Maybe they did nto tell you about her because they did not want to worry you and ruin your trip.I hope she continues to get better....Christine
I am so sorry you are feeling down. I know exactly how that is and when life seems to be throwing everything at you. I hope you see a silver lining soon and I wish Skye a speedy recovery!
I'm sorry you are feeling down I think we all do that from time to time life can overwhelm us... Sometimes you just have to have a good cry to cleanse the soul
I can see why you are feeling down, Debby. I think crying is a good release of emotions, I'm always one for a good cry; I think it is healing. I'd allow yourself to feel this way and cry as the tears come. I do hope Skye is feeling better; I'd be a little upset too if someone wasn't forthcoming about what was going on with Koda and his health; we do love these little furry babies so much.
betty
Debby, I think I understand, as I go through periods of depression too. I live three hours from my family and I'm usually sad and homesick after I have been home to visit. I sometimes feel all alone in our current location. I'm happy that Skye is doing better and I can imagine how your heart hurts for her. We do love our dog babies!! ((hugs))
I have to say that even though I suspect that your family had the best intentions (they didn't want to ruin your vacation), I too would be a little upset that they weren't more honest about how Skye was doing ... sure glad that she's doing much better now.
Considering all that you've been through in the last couple of weeks, it's easy to understand that your emotions are all over the place right now ... I think that your tears were a healthy release.
Sorry to hear you are feeling down. Here is a hug for you. (((hug)))
I understand feeling down and especially after a trip. You did have an emotional roller coaster ride! Sometimes we just can't understand our kids! And I'm sure I at least, never will.
Glad Skye is better and maybe things will even out now! I'm going over to read your other blog!
Oh D...llove your heart. Hang in there. (LOVE)
i am glad your pup is okay. as for the emotional roller coaster, fall triggers those in me, it seems. i get melancholy for home, thinking of deceased parents, etc.
I am sorry too that you are feeling down. I know you are worried about Skye - hope she is okay.
And I am so sorry about your emotional time with your friend and her loss.
I will go to your other blog.
Sending you a hug my friend!! I honestly think a "post Vacation let down" after a trip like yours is very normal. I would dare say I too agree with the above poster that your family probably did have the best of intentions regarding Skye. I'm so glad things worked out OK!
Take care of you, and your pup. Off to read your other blog:)
I hope things get easier, and that Skye starts feeling better sooN!
I certainly understand those waves of emotions that wash over us...it's like getting caught under a wave in the ocean and we have no control whatsoever. When we come out on the other side though, we do feel better. Emotional rides are the most exhausting, that's for sure. I also understand the situation with someone not telling you everything about something--something that could have been disastrous. It happens here too. And it's disheartening. I'm just so glad that Skye is healing and doing well. Also glad that you got to visit with your BFF and family and just have a wonderful time! Hang in there- this emotional ride will slow down soon. And you'll have time to rest up before the next one hits! Hugs!
I totally understand why you are upset about Skye, but please let go of the "what ifs" and focus on what is happening right now. Skye is being taken care of.
Depression is horrible to try and live through. I fought it terrible for years. I had a very strong support system and some great doctors that helped me find the light through it.
Being down and feeling that way is not your fault. Depression is an illness. It's an illness that unlike so many others many of us feel embarassed by. I however have to tell you the more I have shared my story the stronger I feel.
Thinking of you Debby and hoping that today was gentle with you... I totally get all of it. Still I am glad that Skye was OK and that you had the experiences you did! I am off now to check out the tears blog. Thinking of you and keeping you in prayer! (((hugs)))
L
Skye is adorable. And a great big *hug* to you Debby. May you find moments of happiness this coming week!
Debby I am sending you a BIG hug as I sit here listening to you dear one.....
Debby, I was running all weekend and didn't get a chance to stop by and see this post. I can relate to it very much as I do have depression and anxiety issues and I do experience that "post-whatever" let down. I think I even experienced it this weekend when I couldn't drag myself out of a funk because the excitement of the move is over and reality is settling in! You are so honest in your blog and I admire you for that, you are helping others as you bare your feelings. My blog is my pick-me-up to keep me from the dark places, but I totally get your total honesty and transparency. So brave! And for that you should feel happy! You had a great time in Chicago with friends and family and it's only natural to hit the wall when you come home.Especially your homecoming with sweet Skye's issues and husband headed out. All's well that ends well with your sweet pup, although I can understand how you must have felt when you learned the details. Sorry that happened. (And just so you know, I would have pitched a hissy fit myself! Not that I'd ever admit it on my blog - lol). Ann
Sounds like you could use a big hug right about now - so I'm sending them virtually. I'm off to read your post, but before I go, ((HUGZ!!))
Hugs my friend. Getting back in your groove will help. As will lunch tomorrow! See you in the morning!
So sorry about your little dog! I'll check out the other blog.
Sandy
I'm so sorry you're feeling down. Sometimes its hard to come back from something so wonderful. And I know how much Skye means to you.
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